Isaiah 41:10

¹⁰ So do not fear, for I am with you;
   do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
   I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.(NIV)

A dear friend reminded me of this verse last night as we chatted on facebook. Thank you Mrs. Battles, for reminding me, for loving my family, for caring enough to let me know what is going on. You are an inspiration to me, you are a prayer warrior, you are an amazing example of a Godly mother and I will be ever grateful for all you pour into my life!
Madison has been gone for 8 days now....187 hours and 37 minutes to be exact. I must be honest in saying that I am surprised she stayed as long as she did. I knew deep in my heart that her stay would not be long. I had hopes and prayers that she would at least make it until she acquired her GED. She is so close! I have been driving her down town every day and Scott has been picking her up after work. She was doing so well in the PACE study program. The only tests she has left are social studies, math and science. A little over a month to go and she would be done! So many people have tried breaking through to get her to understand what the choices she is making will do to her future. She will not listen. We get silence in return for all our messages and calls.
We have had reports from local residents that she has been going door to door telling people she was kicked out of her house and that we have told her she may not come back, she has been telling people she needs money to pay for her GED classes. My heart is aching, I want to stand on the front step and yell at the top of my lungs "I LOVE MY DAUGHTER!! All I want is for her to be healthy, safe and successful!" I feel like the only people fighting for her is Sara and me. This battle we have been waging for years is one I am afraid we may never win. As we sit here stuck in the middle of what could have/should have been and what we wish to be and reality. Our hands are tied by the cords of "adulthood" wrapped securely around the wrists of a young lady who aged out before her time. Before we could make a lasting difference. If only we had monetary resources that had no limits we could have her in an amazing program in Texas who specializes in teaching young people with bipolar and other mental health issues to live...LIVE successful healthy lives. If you knew Madison and read about this program you would think it was created with her in mind! A focus on Art therapy ~ she is an amazing artist! Equestrian therapy daily! Madison was born to ride horses! It saddens me that a program so successful is only accessible to the wealthy. The monthly tuition for such a program is way more than we even bring in monthly!
Now she is running with a group of people who make poor choices, have no idea what she deals with inside her head and heart, all in the name of claiming freedom.
So today I am leaning on the verse in Isaiah. I am trying not to fear for her safety I am trying to remind myself that she was the daughter of The King of Kings before she was mine. He loves her more than I could ever imagine and I am trusting in Him. Some days it is so very hard....