Being a mom is a tough job sometimes. Mothers everywhere can stand united and agree that some days just stink!
I have learned over the last year that blending families is nearly impossible. I have learned that the love in a mothers heart for her children is not always enough. I have loved ALL of my children as if they were born to me. I am a birth mother of 3 and I have resigned myself to the knowlege that I will only always be a STEP mother. I despise that term. STEP. It was banned from our family vocabulary before we became a family and now nearly 17 years later it has become my title. I can not even put into words the pain this places in my heart. The knowlege that not only the child you raised and loved for so many years rejects you but so do many of the key people in that life. We all make mistakes. No parent is perfect. I know that I have made my share of them. I have made every attempt at making them right and learning so that I will not repeat the same mistakes over.
I am also a mother of 3 adopted children. Being an adoptive mother is a special blessing that carries pain of its own. There has never been a time that I have looked into the beautiful eyes of those 3 children and Not thought of their birth mother. and everytime my heart cries a little for them. Because the day my life was richly blessed by becoming their forever mother was the same day they lost their child forever. I know there are very good reasons that they could not be reunited. Lord knows we tried with all our might to make that our goal. Sometimes it is best to give the child a new life. I am blessed to be called their mom. RICHLY BLESSED. I am also foster mother to many. these beautiful children come into my life, stay for a time and return healthy and happy to the family they were born to. What a beautiful blessing that day is!
Each mother role I hold carries its own joys and sorrows. But the deepest heartache is when you know your child no longers wants to be yours.

Its funny. The older I get the more I crave a simpler life. I want to purge my home of unwanted, unused, unnecessary things. I want to make more things from scratch. I want to live in a quiet peace filled space. I want to focus my energy not on things but on loving the people in my life completely.
I want peace in my family, in my relationships, in my home. I pray this year is a year of blessings for Dropz of Hope and the children and families we serve. I pray the God will give me the courage and strength to show love no matter what to those who cross my path.