Having a child or family member with a mental illness is a tricky thing. For me I have spent the better part of the past 17 years being judged and blamed for the mental health condition of one of our children. Yes. There have been times I have been hurt defensive angry and even rude.
The interesting thing is that a dear woman told me several years ago that the truth will eventually be revealed it may be a very long time before it happens but it will.
Recently the eyes of a few have been opened to reality. Blinders have been removed and they have been provided an opportunity to see the truth. I am not sure if it will be a breakthrough with lasting effects or if it will be short lived. I have thought many times over the years how would I respond if I was approached by someone who had judged me so harshly. I honestly never came up with a response, the idea was so unfathomable that I could not imagine what I would do.
In the end a few things happened.
1. I felt compassion for the situation the others are in, it is difficult, painful and very sad to see a loved one struggle with mental health problems, to wake up one day and realize things are not what they seemed.
2. I realized something. This is not about me at all. I mean there have been moments over the years that I have known in my head that it was never about me, as a person. This exact thing would have happened to anyone in my position. Once I realized and fully understood that this is truly about my loved one I gained a new perspective. I was surprised not to feel the old familiar urgency to save her, to not feel the sleepless nights taking a toll on my health and mind, not to feel the stress and anxiety,  not to fight tears at any given moment.
3. I can love her, pray for what is best for her and for her safety. But I can not change her or her circumstance. Until she wants to change those nothing will be different or better.
I got this email devotion today Titled Second Chances. OK Lord I am  listening.....
I believe in second chances, I pray others would offer them to me when I mess up. Along with second chances comes forgiveness. A tough pill to swallow sometimes but one we are expected COMMANDED to...I forgive because I deeply desire to BE forgiven. If I don't truly forgive with every corner of my heart then how could I ever expect others to extend the same unto me?
I was reminded of this.....

 

 "It is of the LORD's mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness" (Lamentations 3:22-23).