Let me begin today by apologizing....I know I call this my transparent heart...then when things get all cloudy in my life lately I hide and stop writing. Not fair. Not honest. I am sorry.
I have been fasting and praying for about a week now and several things are being revealed to me. My personal life has been spinning for about a year now, truth be known much longer than that...I am trying to get this Dropz of Hope thing off the ground. I know that God placed this fire in my heart to reach the foster children of our community. I know that God wants us to unite as a VILLAGE and care for those in need around us. For some reason I hit bump after bump in the road. I have been confused and honestly questioning whether I heard His voice correctly. I have been fighting a battle in my heart surrounding my Grand Mother. The most precious lady in my life...I have been fighting bitterness and anger towards certain family member and the way they have been treating her. Now there are all kinds of changes and hurt flooding my church. So, rather than cause controversy or offend people. I have distance myself from my Transparent Heart and held my tongue.
This morning I read this prayer written by Lisa Bevere and it touched me. I do not have to act out of my hurt, bitterness, anger, confusion. I have to be sure my heart is right and lies exactly where my Father created it to be. He will speak through me. through my actions. through my attitudes. through my words. I want more than anything to be an example of Grace like the many strong women I see in my life and around me. Gramma, Ann, Mommee, Brenda, Joslyn...these are a small handful of the women I look to as examples of how to carry yourself in the face of adverse times in life. I am in awe of the favor God has placed on them. The courage and strength they possess can only come from God.
God is working on my heart. I am a work in progress. Be patient with me as I allow His grace to guide me through these stages of my journey.